Five years ago I was attending the University of Toledo living in a house just off campus with five other roommates. Two of my roommates and I were celebrating our birthdays on valentine’s day weekend, so we decided to throw a giant party. Many of our friends from Bowling Green University were also attending our party including one of my best friends, and “long lost twin sister”, Jen. A week prior to the party Jen had mentioned to me that a Guatemalan girl was passing through Bowling Green for a week and needed a place to stay so Jen had offered her apartment. Never meeting the Guatemalan girl before she arrived at her apartment, Jen had no idea what to expect. In that moment Jen had told me that she was bringing me a wife for my birthday, but her only worry was that she would be too tall for me. The day before the party the Guatemalan girl named Martha arrived at Jens house and Jen promptly sent me an instant message telling me how fun Martha was. I believe her exact words were .. “Jeremiah, your wife is so fun. Fun. Fun. Fun.”

The night of the party and I was in charge of collecting donations for the beer, with a giant pretzel jar that read, “We’re poor college students, please feed us!”. With little success in collecting much money I did end up with dozens of cell phones in the jar instead. Anyways, I finally met Martha that night and knowing she was 22 years old when she asked me how old I was turning I told her 24 when really I had just turned 20. Besides the story about being my wife Jen had also told everyone that Martha was a Guatemalan Princess.

It’s amazing how many people don’t know where Guatemala is. Some think its an island, others think that Guatemalans live in trees, and others think that its a part of Mexico.

So after meeting Martha that night I didn’t have much of a chance to talk to her because of all the people and noise so I decided to drive to Bowling Green to see Jen and Martha. Being as shy as I am it was rather difficult for me to talk to Martha alone, and when Jen would leave the room so would I. I wanted Jen to tell Martha about the story she had made up about being my wife but she refused.

That week went by fast considering I wasn’t able to go back to Bowling Green much and get to know Martha better. At that time Martha was working with a photography professor from Bowling Green that also has a company in Guatemala and had asked Martha to assist him in Malta for a month. They were only passing through Bowling Green in order to collect some photography equipment they needed for Malta.

Not knowing if I would ever see or talk to Martha again, Jen came up with a great idea to email Martha with telling her everyone’s email addresses so she could keep in touch. Her plan worked successfully. Martha emailed everyone on the list including me, starting our conversations of hundreds of emails to follow.

Returning from Malta, Martha was passing again through Bowling Green for one night only and needed a place to stay so I volunteered. It was summer so I was working at the time, but we still had our house in Toledo for one month more. I took the day off work and picked Martha up from the Toledo airport. That night we went to a local coffee shop to listen to a live band and play chess. She won of course. When we returned back to my house for the night I finally told her she was my wife. She laughed saying, she would have to tell her Dad she left for Malta and returned with a husband. The next day before the airport she invited me to ice cream. Her flight was late so I decided to stay with her longer in the airport talking to her.

After she left we continued to stay in touch via mail and Instant Messenger. We probably talked to each other for hours on the messenger while we were both at work. In one of our conversations I said, “What kind of husband would I be if I didn’t come and visit my wife”. Not taking me very seriously, Martha told me to come to Guatemala. So, she was a little surprised when I actually bought my ticket to visit her, considering everyone says they will visit but never actually do.

When I arrived in Guatemala, Martha housed me in her parent’s house. She lied to her dad telling him that I had come to Guatemala to help the photography professor with some computer issues and I needed a place to stay. That week she was a great tour guide showing me almost all of Guatemala. The beautiful lake Atitlan that is surrounded by volcanoes, the great mayan pyramids in Tikal, and even the old colonial city of Antigua. I did not dare make a move on Martha as shy as I am so she considered us only friends.

To be continued…